Tindell Baldwin »

Insecurities

My friends and I have a small group together where we are going through the book “So long Insecurities” by Beth Moore and each week we sit around and work through the lies we believe everyday. It is great for creating real friendships because you can’t put up a lot of walls when you are being utterly honest about your insecurities. A lot of times we laugh about how crazy we have been with our husbands when estrogen takes over our brain but we are always digging into reality. We are getting to the heart of what makes us tick and we are seeing lies for what they really are.

It is a powerful thing when you can say out loud to the group “I am terrified of …….”. There is great power in keeping things a secret. We forget that the power of the secret is in not saying it out loud but when we can open up and let it out it looses its power over us. My secret is that I am terrified of girls, blame it on growing up with boys but girls have always made me uncomfortable. Boys will say exactly what they mean and you know where you stand but with girls it is a game that I have never been very good at. I am gaining confidence though, each week I leave thanking God that he has provided me with true friends in a very trying time in my life.

So this week we had bible study/Christmas party and the husbands were invited to join after we had gone over the book. Basically they sat upstairs and talked about us and we sat downstairs and talked about them. We always wrap up with prayer request and this week my good friend (hopefully she still will be after I post this blog) had tears in her eyes as she told us she had fallen behind on her quiet times. It was literally hurting her that she hadn’t been faithful to her relationship with God. I ached for that. I couldn’t remember the last time I had a real quiet time and yet it didn’t seem to phase me. I can’t imagine how much it touched God that his child was so hurt by her failure to communicate with him. Her broken heart touched me and I am striving to be that wrapped up in God, so much so that it hurts me when we don’t talk like loosing a close friend.

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  • thisonesborntorun - I'm right there with you lady. It's a really hard thing to balance with the chaos of life. I have been further away than I ever imagined I would be simply because of my lack of time. I've had to be SO intentional, but I feel the same way. I want my friend back. I want the voice walking right beside me back. Thanks for posting!ReplyCancel

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